Controlled Dildos For Couples

What sets a couples' controlled dildo apart

Unlike a standard dildo, a controlled dildo has a motor and a wireless remote or app, which means the person using it doesn't have to do all the work. That frees both partners to focus on each other: one can kiss, touch or use a second toy while the other adjusts the dildo's settings. For couples, the best models have easy-to-read remotes, strong but quiet motors and a flared base for safe use.

Thrusting, vibrating or gyrating?

Vibrating dildos give a buzzing sensation that spreads through the vaginal walls or the prostate. Thrusting dildos move in and out on their own, mimicking intercourse. Gyrating models rotate the head to massage the G-spot or P-spot. If you can't decide, a combination toy like the Squiggler gives you all three.

Ways to play together

Use a controlled dildo during oral sex so the receiving partner feels penetration and clitoral stimulation together. Try it as a warm-up before intercourse, or for double penetration fantasies with a partner. With a compatible harness, a remote dildo becomes a vibrating strap-on, and the wearer can hand the remote to the receiver so they control the pace.

Distance play

App controlled dildos and machines let a partner control speed and rhythm from another location. Set up a video call, make sure the toy is paired and charged, and agree on how you'll communicate if something needs to change.

Size and material

Medium-sized dildos around 5 to 7 inches suit most couples. Body-safe silicone is warm, smooth and easy to clean. For anal use, always choose a dildo with a flared base or suction cup.

Building up slowly

Even experienced couples benefit from a slow start with a new controlled dildo. Begin with lots of foreplay, use the lowest speed while inserting, and let the receiving partner tell the controller when they're ready for more. Thrusting toys in particular feel stronger than you expect, so increase the speed one step at a time and keep talking throughout.